The Temple of George W. Bush
A place for the veneration of images of our Dear Leader.
Saturday, March 01, 2003
Welcome to the Temple of George W. Bush
While not normally a person of strong religious or political conviction, recent events have opened my eyes to those spheres and to the recent confluence of them.
Our Dear Leader is officially described (with becoming modesty) as a man of simple piety and moral clarity. It is with this simple pious clarity that our Dear Leader has inextricably committed America's most valuable and irreplaceable assets -- its very lives, treasury, credibility, goodwill, moral leadership, and alliances -- to the elimination of Saddam Hussein, an inhuman Cyclops who is officially described as being a million, billion times worse than Hitler. Hitler was at least elected in a fair democratic process, Saddam cannot even claim that simple distinction which is necessary for legitimate governance over a free people.
The essential meaning of these developments escaped me until this last week, when, after an unusual lapse in my household hygene, I was blessed to receive the following image in the interior of my water closet:
The observant among you may note that the upper part of the stain resembles our Dear Leader. Being observant myself, and not incurious, I asked, "If Jesus can appear in a tortilla, why can't our Dear Leader appear in a commode?" And answer came there none.
Stricken with a wave of religious awe, I then knelt before the blessed commode and prayed until my knees were bleeding and purulent. Through the haze of pain, I suddenly was inspired to know that the Almighty has sent him, our Dear Leader, to guide us, the American people, in this, the hour of our greatest crisis, which he, our Dear Leader, created.
I published the picture of the Blessed Commode in such timely web-periodicals as Fark, so that all the Nations could rejoice in the good news of our deliverence.
Afterward, joyous reports started flooding in from all over a grateful country, bearing tidings of numerous miraculous appearences of the image of our Dear Leader.
Heeding the call, I established this quiet place of meditation on the Web for the reverent contemplation of our Dear Leader's image. I do not yet know what the official White House position is on veneration of such images, but I have reason to believe they would have no objection to it.
Please, if you are possession of any such blessed images, do not conceal them from a mocking public. Mail them to me at templeofgwbush AT hotmail.com. I will post as many as I can for the purposes of public veneration.
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