The Temple of George W. Bush
A place for the veneration of images of our Dear Leader.
Monday, March 17, 2003
"God does not talk to the sane." Dear Leader and I are living proof of the untruth of that cliche.
Just as the Almighty was pleased to cause your unworthy Prophet to know of Dear Leader's anointment, He has blessed me with another revelation.
The Good News was made known to me as I was refinishing a coffee table in my poorly-ventilated Manhattan apartment. As I applied a heavy layer of varnish remover to the table's surface, I suddenly became lightheaded with religious ecstacy. Losing consciousness, I had a miraculous vision:
I awoke with a splitting headache, and with my forehead firmly adhered to my coffee table.
The meaning of my vision is clear. The Almighty is not content to place Dear Leader over America. No--God intends to make our Dear Leader the new Cyrus, the new Alexander, the new Caesar, the new Charlemagne, yet greater than all of them combined. All the Nations are to submit to Dear Leader's will.
Even now, hundreds of thousands of heavily armed Missionaries are preparing to flood across now-irrelevant borders to spread the Gospel to the Heathen masses. I implore the Faithful to keep their televisions on at all times, tuned to Fox News, and rejoice with great gladness that the new Order is at hand.
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