The Temple of George W. Bush

A place for the veneration of images of our Dear Leader.

Jump to the post that started it all.

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?
Wednesday, April 30, 2003
 
The Gospel of Dear Leader


This weblog is getting awfully long and it's confusing for newcomers, so your unworthy Prophet will now undertake to write of those matters which have been fulfiled among us.

In November to December A.D. 2000, it pleased Almighty God to perform a series of astonishing
miracles
that resulted in our Dear Leader being invested with the power of the President of the United States. After a short while of being denied control of the Senate, Dear Leader and his Blessed Party took over all three branches of the federal government. Dear Leader then undertook a series of crimes so bold that no one had the guts to report them openly, and such reports as they were were deemed incredible. Now, Dear Leader has pretty much the entire Globe, except for maybe Kashmir and parts of Africa, under his cowboybootheel.

In the weeks before the conquest of Iraq, the appearance of Dear Leader's Blessed Visage in a stain on the interior of my water closet caused a nationwide religious awakening, as the People realized Dear Leader actually was, as he says, appointed by the Almighty. The miracle was repeated across the country: on a sweat sock, on a pig's hindquarter, in frostblisters, on the Dale Earnhardt goat, and on a suspicious-looking mole, probably a melanoma of some sort. Since the first apparation was in my sanitary appliance, I took on the role of Dear Leader's Prophet.

Controversy swirled around the Blessed Swine as he was mobbed by the faithful, taken to a secure undisclosed location, went missing, was reported as pignapped by Iraq, but that hoax was uncovered, and his whereabouts are still unknown.

It then pleased God to reveal to your unworthy Prophet the world's destiny under Dear Leader. After being coronated, Dear Leader rapidly brought the world into his grasp (1 2), easily crushing the token opposition (1 2 3).

Also, a number of theological questions were answered (1 2 3 4 5 ).

And there will be some changes in 2004, but please don't bother yourself with that.

posted by grytpype at 11:24 AM


Comments: Post a Comment